Well last week was National Natural Family Week so I found it quite appropriate that this week is World Breastfeeding Week! So this week I’m hoping to share a few thoughts on breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is an extension of pregnancy. It’s a beautiful bond between a baby and his/her mother. I am truly truly thankful for the gift of breastfeeding that was given to me and all my siblings and that I have now in turn given to my children.
As a child, I still remember going with my mom to La Leche League meetings. All I knew about this milk club was that it was a place moms got together and sat around and nursed and talked while I got to play with the toys so I loved LLL meeting nights! I always wondered though where the milk was. Now my kids practically beg me to let them come with me every 2nd Tuesday of the month. When we drive by the church where the meetings are, they always call out, “La Leche Lee!”
When I was pregnant with our first, breastfeeding was the obvious choice. I honestly never thought about why I wouldn’t nurse and even more honestly I grew up thinking that a mom who bottlefed was either poor or there was something wrong with her or her baby. This wasn’t a judgemental thought, it was just how I understood it given my environment and upbringing.
So when my baby girl was born and it was time to nurse her, I was expecting it to be easy and wonderful. While we were in the hospital, the nurses had their hands all over me and her helping us so it wasn’t until we got home really that I started to panic. There was nothing euphoric about breastfeeding for me. In fact, when it was time to nurse, my husband had to help me relax in the same way he did while I was in labor.
My toes curled, my back ached, my nipples cracked and bled and I walked around as much as I could without a shirt on (anything that touched my nipples made me cry in pain) and a burp cloth under my boobs because there was a constant flow of milk oozing out of them. My baby cried and cried…and cried. She never seemed to be happy or satisfied and we walked around the house all day and all.night. long. This lasted for about 3-4 weeks and while we were totally in love with our baby girl and I still never even dreamed of sending my husband out to get formula, those were some pretty hellish times for us.
One day after a nursing I went to change her diaper. I bent down to pick up something on the floor and when I got up there was blood all over her head. After some deep breaths I was able to figure out that she had spat up and since my nipples were bleeding she spat up blood and then she had turned her head on it.
I cried. A lot.
That night (or at least soon after that) I remembered La Leche League and I let go of my stupid pride and accepted the fact that I needed help.
I went to the meeting and listened to some of the other moms and then it came to my turn and I let it all out. And they all listened. And, as corny as this sounds, I felt like every moms’ heart there reached out to me and squeezed mine, supported me, encouraged me, let me know that everything was going to be ’OK’. I wasn’t a terrible mother and there wasn’t anything wrong with me or her.
They suggested that I check my latch and try and relax as much as possible. If I didn’t get her latched on the right way from the start, bring her off and start again.
A bad latch = pain, bleeding nipples, a hungry sad baby, and a very frustrated and tired mom and dad.
As the weeks passed we got better at it. I learned to relax and got really good at checking that latch. I had thought the baby would just know what to do but I had been wrong. She needed me to lead her, and I needed her to lead me. The problem was that we were both new at it. So with the help and support of experienced moms, we were able to work through it. And eventually breastfeeding wasn’t painful anymore. My nipples weren’t cracked and bleeding anymore, my back didn’t ache and I learned how to nurse laying down.
A few months later I remember I was nursing her and suddenly realized something. My toes weren’t curled and I was actually enjoying it! I nursed my baby girl until she was little over 2 (when I was pregnant with our 2nd) and I am so thankful that God sent me those moms. Even if all they did was encourage me by their own example and willingness to help a new young fumbling mother and her sweet innocent baby.
A great post for a great week! Your first nursing experience sounds very similar to my beginning experience with nursing Ira. Nursing may be all-natural, but it doesn’t always come naturally! Moms-to-be need to hear this! It may be HELLACIOUS at first, but it does get better! Ruby was also a very good nurser from the get-go, but I still had cracked, bleeding, painful nipples. At 3 weeks, I was just about ready to throw in the towel (though I knew in my head I never would, my body was just about to the end of it’s endurance) Finally, I tried a different hold (the football hold) and found that it wasn’t near as painful to nurse her that way, and my sore, sore nipples could finally heal. I had to nurse her that way for a couple of weeks, and though it wasn’t how I pictured nursing her (cradled in my arms) it’s what I had to do. At about 5-6 weeks, nursing was finally the comfortable, natural, bonding experience that everyone thinks of when they think of nursing! Okay, so I should apparently have written my own blog post about this… we’ll have to see if I can make time for it!
love it – “hellacious’! So true! Way to stick to it! Yes breastfeeding definitely requires an open and creative attitude as well as a determined one. So glad you were able to figure out that football hold!
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